Requested by undrmsknxx0 & anonymous
A quick note before the episode transcript. I'm afraid my copy of this episode goes a bit wonky around the 16-17 minute mark, so a couple of the scenes in the boat house are incomplete and marked with [Indecipherable]. Seeing as this episode was a request, I decided to post it up anyway. If any of you can fill in the missing gaps, please feel free to leave a comment!
[In the corridor at John Adams High, Topanga and Angela emerge from a classroom carrying textbooks]
ANGELA: [to Topanga] Ok, what’s with you? Feeny asked twenty questions and you only answered twelve.
TOPANGA: [takes an envelope from her back pocket and sighs] This fell out of Cory’s bag at the ski lodge. I think it might be from Lauren.
ANGELA: [gasps] Talk-All-Night Lauren?!
ANGELA: That girl should have a radio show – what more could she have to say?
TOPANGA: [grimly] I don’t know, I haven’t read it.
[Angela snatches the envelope away from Topanga]
ANGELA: Yeah right. [inspects the envelope] Hey, you did a good job of sealing it back up!
TOPANGA: No! Really I didn’t read it, it wouldn’t be right!
ANGELA: Hello? And stealing your boyfriend is?
TOPANGA: All they did was talk.
ANGELA: [raising her eyebrows] Ooh, there’s a new saint in town. Saint Topanga of the Deep. Deep denial.
TOPANGA: Ok, you say denial - I say trust.
ANGELA: Whoops, look at that! [rips the envelope] It opened!
TOPANGA: [shielding her view from the letter so she can’t see it] No no no! No! I don’t want anything to change my relationship with Cory! I don’t want to read that letter, I want to burn it!
ANGELA: [reading the letter] Ooh, actually you don’t have to burn it, this thing’s already smoking.
[Topanga snatches at the letter but Angela holds it behind her back]
TOPANGA: Gimmie that!
ANGELA: I don’t think you should see this!
[They squabble over the letter for a while]
TOPANGA: Give it to me!
ANGELA: I’m trying to protect you, you short little white girl.
TOPANGA: You’re right, I don’t want to read that letter.
[Angela relaxes and Topanga snatches it from her grasp and reads it, Angela looks worried]
TOPANGA: Oh no.
[Shawn and Cory enter the corridor from the other end and head for their lockers, the scene turns to them]
SHAWN: Y’know, I get so depressed around Valentine’s Day.
CORY: What’s depressing about Valentine’s Day, Shawn? Especially when you have a girlfriend to spend it with.
SHAWN: Ok, first of all, I have to remember it. It’s not like Christmas when you have all month to think about it – I’m still cleaning up after Groundhog Day, and I turn around and the mailman gives me a Valentine.
CORY: From who?
SHAWN: From the mailman.
[Cory stares at him]
SHAWN: And of course I didn’t get him anything and I can’t really tell him it’s in the mail--
CORY: Shawn, forget the mailman. What about your girlfriend?
SHAWN: Well, it’s the first Valentine’s that’s ever meant anything to me, I’m just afraid that I’m gonna screw it up.
CORY: Well you know what? I am going to help you out. I am a Valentine’s Day veteran, Shawn, I march at the parade.
SHAWN: What do you and Topanga have planned? The usual perfect romantic evening?
CORY: [grinning] Mmhmm. We have a dinner at Chubbies. See every Valentine’s Day me and Topanga try to recreate our first date so we remember how much we love each other, and that nothing can get in the way of that.
SHAWN: Sort of like renewing your vows.
CORY: Which is especially important you do in your teen years. See Shawn, if you want a perfect relationship, just do what Topanga and I do—
[Topanga comes rushing up to them and she slams Cory into the lockers]
TOPANGA: [to Cory] I want to talk to you.
SHAWN: Alright! [slams Angela into the lockers and declares] I want to talk to you!
TOPANGA: [to Cory] When were you planning on telling me about Lauren’s letter?
CORY: Uh... uh... uh, now. I was going to tell you about it now.
TOPANGA: Cory, I’ve never once had to wonder if you were telling me the truth. You kissed her and you lied to me about it. I don’t know if I can trust you now. I don’t know how we’re going to work that out, Cory.
[Topanga hands Cory Lauren’s letter and walks away; Angela follows Topanga, leaving Cory reading Lauren’s letter]
CORY: Oh no.
[Still the corridor. Cory is slumped on the floor against the lockers; Shawn is reading the letter and pacing around him]
SHAWN: Ugh, how could you let Topanga read this? [sits on the floor by Cory]
CORY: Well we hit this boring stretch on the bus ride home so I figured, hey we’ve got some spare time, why don’t I destroy the relationship? [seriously] I thought I lost the letter!
SHAWN: Hey, hey, don’t jump on me, I’m not the one who kissed you.
CORY: No, but... [stands up] y’know, you are the one who told me to lie about the kiss in the first place.
SHAWN: [stands up too] I’m sorry, Cory, but it was the best thing I could think of at the time. I don’t see where lying’s the issue – tell the gym coach I have malaria.
[Shawn walks off; Cory goes in the other direction, overhearing three girls by the lockers]
JENNIFER: I hear Cory Matthews met some mountain girl on the senior ski trip and Topanga found out.
[Cory leans in conspiratorially]
CORY: Yeah? Well I hear you’re really a guy.
JENNIFER: [in a deep voice] So?
[Freaked out, Cory runs away; the girls continue gossiping]
LIBBY: Cory and Topanga are history? I told you that wouldn’t work out.
DANA: You said that twelve years ago.
[Angela walks past]
DANA: Hey Angela, why did Cory lie to Topanga about the kiss and the letter?
[Angela stops to pick up the school newspaper]
ANGELA: How could you possibly know about this?
[Dana gestures to the newspaper, where the headline reads ‘CORY AND TOPANGA SPLIT!’]
JENNIFER: Just face it – all men are dogs.
ANGELA: Not all men.
LIBBY: Oh come on, you’ve got Kujo.
ANGELA: [affronted] Shawn is not a dog. He’s a great guy.
DANA: Yeah, I thought so too. He made a picnic for me in the snow and told me how special I was, and how we were always going to be together. We even made plans for this Valentine’s Day.
LIBBY: He made plans with you this Valentine’s Day? He made plans with me, and he said I was his girlfriend – which I was, for about a week.
JENNIFER: Oh I got two weeks, but he gave me a cold. [to Angela] So, he told you you were going to spend Valentine’s Day together?
LIBBY: That he’d take you somewhere nice.
DANA: That you’ll be together forever.
ANGELA: We’re going to dinner and a movie – nothing fancy, no big deal.
DANA: Shawn’s incapable of committing to a Valentine’s Day date. He knows how important it is to a relationship!
LIBBY: He’ll back out.
JENNIFER: Because he doesn’t know how to be a boyfriend. He says things he thinks we want to hear, but he doesn’t mean them. [to Dana] I think he should pay.
[Topanga appears in the corridor followed by someone taking pictures and someone trying to interview her]
TOPANGA: [aggravated] I said no comment, you little Jimmy Olsen freak! And please, no more pictures! [grabs the camera and pulls out all the film]
LIBBY: [sympathetically] Topanga, you poor thing.
DANA: I know it’s early, but when you’re ready my brother’s face is really clearing up...
ANGELA: Are you two vultures finished?
TOPANGA: Look what’s going on with me and Cory is going on between me and Cory, ok? [rips a page off a boy’s notebook] That’s not a quote, Ira!
[Topanga, the photographer and Ira leave]
ANGELA: [to the girls] Look, ladies, thanks for your concern but I think I know Shawn better than all of you. And I trust him.
[Angela walks off to Shawn defiantly; the girls smirk]
JENNIFER: She thinks she knows him, huh?
[Angela and Shawn talk by themselves while the girls eavesdrop]
SHAWN: [smiles] Hey! I can’t believe what’s going on between Cory and Topanga.
ANGELA: I know! Like, whose idea was it to lie to her?
SHAWN: [grins] Well it was the best thing I could think of at the time.
ANGELA: [glares] What?
SHAWN: I was trying to protect them...
ANGELA: Would you lie to me?
SHAWN: [without hesitation] No.
ANGELA: ...You said that a little fast.
SHAWN: Well I wouldn’t! I’d never lie to you, ok? [earnestly] I would never disappoint you.
ANGELA: [smiles] Are we still on for tonight?
SHAWN: Yeah! [grinning] In fact, I’m gonna take you to some place nice, and I’m going to surprise you with candy and flowers.
ANGELA: Shawn, that’s great! But I don’t care as much about candy and flowers as much as us being together.
[Shawn and Angela kiss; the girls watch on with contempt]
JENNIFER: She’s buying it.
LIBBY: Didn’t we?
DANA: I wish there was a way to show Angela what Shawn’s really like before she gets hurt.
JENNIFER: [shrewdly] Maybe there is. Y’know what? I think Shawn Hunter’s finally going to keep a date for Valentine’s Day.
[Shawn and Jack’s apartment; Jack enters the living area while Eric sits on the couch reading]
JACK: Y’know, this whole Valentine’s Day thing is one big scam. The greeting card companies, the candy stores – all trying to rip off the innocent consumer.
ERIC: No date, huh?
JACK: I am so lonely!
ERIC: [getting up off the couch] Let me tell you something, my friend - rejoice in your solitude and kiss it on the lips.
JACK: Why would I do that?
ERIC: Because having a date for Valentine’s Day is like having an IOU for the rest of your life. [reaches in the fridge for a soda]
JACK: Yeah, y’know, women take this day way too seriously.
ERIC: Today is the day women turn their men into love-puppets.
[Shawn enters from the bedroom with a huge smile on his face and carrying a heart-shaped box of chocolates]
JACK: [looking at Shawn] Got a hot date, Pinocchio?
SHAWN: I got her candy!
ERIC: [taking the box from Shawn] Aw, never give a chick candy, man! Just give her the twenty bucks instead – she’ll appreciate the cash and maybe she’ll buy you something nice. [takes a bite out of one of the chocolates, screws up his face in disgust, and puts it back in the box]
JACK: So my little brother likes someone enough to go on a Valentine’s Day date, huh?
SHAWN: Yeah. Usually I find a reason not to show up, but... [smiles] I think I’m gonna make it to this one.
JACK: You’re really gonna do this, huh?
SHAWN: Yeah, I really am.
[Someone knocks on the door, all three get up to answer it – Shawn in front]
ERIC: Love? We got love, huh?
JACK: He’s dressed very nicely... [to Shawn] Hey, does she feel the same way about you?
[Shawn opens the door, expecting Angela, to find no one there; on the floor is a bunch of flowers which Shawn picks up]
JACK: Yeah, I guess she does.
SHAWN: [reading the card] “I can’t stop thinking about you, here’s to our night of romance! Meet me at the boat house. Love, Angela.” [turns to Jack and Eric with a big grin] Excuse me boys, I have a date [gives the flowers to Eric] that I want to keep.
[Shawn leaves; Jack and Eric close the door looking grim]
JACK: Next Valentine’s Day?
ERIC: Dates. Definitely dates.
[The boat house. Shawn walks in cheerfully and takes off his jacket, looking around]
SHAWN: Angela? Your Valentine is here!
[There’s no response; the boat house appears to be empty]
SHAWN: Your Valentine? Shawn?
[Shawn hangs his coat up and walks around]
SHAWN: Women – can’t be on time for their own romantic rendezvous.
[Jennifer appears from behind an old upturned boat; Shawn is immediately unnerved]
JENNIFER: Don’t know a trap set by their ex-girlfriends when they walk right into it.
SHAWN: Jennifer, what... what are you doing here?
JENNIFER: Oh we’re just keeping our dates for Valentine’s. Remember?
DANA: Hey, Shawn.
[Dana appears and handcuffs Shawn to a nearby ladder; Shawn is completely thrown]
SHAWN: Wow, your tastes have completely changed since our last date when we went skating.
DANA: Yeah, a lot of things have changed, Shawn. But not you, even though Angela thinks you have.
LIBBY: But we know better.
[Libby appears holding a large roll of duck tape]
SHAWN: Libby! How’re you doing? [nervously] What’s the tape for, I wonder?
LIBBY: This is the one time sweet talking isn’t going to get you out of anything.
DANA: We’re not going to let you hurt Angela.
SHAWN: [shocked] Why would I hurt Angela? I love her. You guys are hurting Angela by not letting me go! Why are you doing this?
JENNIFER: [smirking] Oh you’ll have your time to speak, Shawn.
[Libby rips off a piece of tape]
LIBBY: But not now! [sticks the tape over Shawn’s mouth]
JENNIFER: Now you’re in our court. Let the trial of Shawn Hunter begin.
DANA: [sweetly] Happy Valentine’s Day.
[Shawn and Jack’s apartment. Jack is on the phone and pacing; Eric is on the couch with a magazine in his lap but he’s watching Jack]
JACK: [on the phone] Hi, Melissa? Jack Hunter. Happy Valentine’s Day. I know you probably don’t remember me. [pauses] Oh, you do? [covers the mouthpiece and says quickly to Eric] She was the hottest girl in third grade, man! [on the phone] So, uh, Melissa. Look I know this is short notice, but if you don’t have a date tonight... [pauses] Oh, that’s Sister Melissa now? Are you still hot? [pauses] Hello? Hello?? [tuts and puts the phone down]
ERIC: You just gave up too easily.
[Jack rolls his eyes. There’s a knock at the door; Jack and Eric both get up to answer it – it’s Angela]
ANGELA: Hey, guys.
ERIC: Oh! Hey Angela, whatcha doing here?
ANGELA: Meeting Shawn for our Valentine’s date.
ANGELA: Here. He’s here, isn’t he?
JACK & ERIC: Uhhhh.... [make awkward gestures]
[The boat house. Jennifer, Libby and Dana are still interrogating a bound and gagged Shawn]
LIBBY: You said you were going to call, and you never did. One night of kissing and you were out the door. Do you think that didn’t mean anything to me?
[Shawn speaks but it’s too muffled to understand. Libby rips off the tape]
[The girls smirk]
SHAWN: It was kissing. I – I didn’t know it was meant to mean anything.
LIBBY: [to the girls] I say we move right to the penalty phase.
SHAWN: Wait, wait, wait a minute! Can I say something here?
DANA: We should let him talk.
SHAWN: [gratefully] Thank you, Dana. You were always the reasonable one.
JENNIFER: [stands up menacingly] What was I?
SHAWN: You were the ahhhahaa... [grimaces as Jennifer towers over him] Look, I understand what you guys are trying to do here – you’re trying to protect Angela from me. But you don’t have to, because I really care about her.
DANA: [hurt] Didn’t you really care about me?
SHAWN: [gently] Yeah, I did at the time.
LIBBY: And what about me?
SHAWN: Yeah. I did.
JENNIFER: And what about me?
SHAWN: Ahhhahaha... [grimaces]
[Jack and Eric suddenly peer in through the window]
ERIC: [to Jack] Look at that, Shawn broke off his date with Angela to be with three girls.
JACK: Wait a minute, he’s handcuffed.
ERIC: [grins] That little devil!
JACK: [glares] I don’t think he’s enjoying it.
ERIC: That’s his problem.
[The Matthews’ kitchen. Amy and Alan are stood by the counter talking a Morgan enters carrying to large heart-shaped boxes of chocolate]
AMY: Wow, that’s an awful lot of candy for someone who’s already so sweet.
MORGAN: One box is from Henry and one box is from Jimmy. [grins] I haven’t decided which one’s my boyfriend yet. [goes upstairs]
ALAN: [to Amy] Ooh we’re raising a very fickle woman there.
AMY: At least somebody got some candy.
ALAN: Well, I was going to get you a box but I know that you’re watching your weight.
[Amy narrows her eyes at him]
ALAN: [guiltily] Gee, isn’t that an interesting thing I just said... ha ha ha... [nervous laugher]
[Amy holds her hand out]
ALAN: Eric said that you would prefer cash.
[Alan keeps hands Amy money and she clicks her fingers for more – this continues as they leave the kitchen for the living room. Cory is on the phone.]
CORY: [on the phone] Ten dozen roses to Miss Laurence, please!
[Angela appears at the back door, knocking frantically]
CORY: [on the phone] I’ll call you right back. [puts the phone down and opens the back door]
CORY: Angela, hi.
ANGELA: Hey. Is Shawn here?
ANGELA: Stop it. He’s standing me up, isn’t he?
CORY: [earnestly] No.
ANGELA: I guess Jennifer was right, he’s just not ready for a serious relationship.
CORY: W-wait a minute. You’re - you’re doubting your whole relationship because of one mistake? C’mon, that’s nothing. Listen, when you’re in a relationship, you don’t doubt first... you trust first.
ANGELA: Interesting you say that considering your current situation.
CORY: Well, my current situation is only my current situation.
[The phone rings; Cory rushes to it]
CORY: [on the phone] Topanga? [pauses] Hi, Eric. [pauses] Shawn did what? [pauses] What boat house?! [pauses] Yeah, Angela’s right here.
ERIC: [on the other end of the phone] Uhhhhhhhh....
[The boat house.]
DANA: [looking at Shawn] Then he said he wanted to be my boyfriend and only go out with me. And I believed him. And... you said that you liked me, but you just didn’t love-me like me.
JENNIFER: [to Dana] And what did you think of that?
DANA: I didn’t understand him actually. But then when he stopped calling... I understood that.
JENNIFER: Thank you. The prosecution calls Libby Harper.
[Libby steps forward]
LIBBY: He came over to my house, and we made out for like three hours. [looks at Shawn] I liked you Shawn. And I thought you liked me.
SHAWN: I did, but people grow apart... and I had another date that night!
JENNIFER: Yeah, with me! [smiles] Sorry, Lib!
LIBBY: [cheerfully] That’s ok! You’re not on trial here. [seriously, pointing at Shawn] He is. [to Shawn] You know what you are. [to the girls] The only person Shawn Hunter is capable of really liking... is Shawn Hunter.
JENNIFER: [with disdain] And that little curly-haired guy.
[Jack and Eric burst in]
JACK: How about a witness for the defence?
SHAWN: [very relieved] Oh, Jack, man am I glad you’re here! Hey Eric.
[Both stand by Shawn]
JACK: What do you girls think you’re doing?
ERIC: How come Shawn’s getting all this attention?
JENNIFER: We’re friends with Angela.
LIBBY: We’re protecting one of our own.
DANA: We don’t want her to get hurt like he hurt us, so he’s on trial for sins against womanhood.
ERIC: ...I gotta go. [walks past Jennifer and looks at her] Yeow!
[Eric and Jennifer smile at each other flirtaciously]
JACK: Look, Shawn’s a good guy, ok? And any girl would be lucky to have him.
SHAWN: Eric, you know me! Tell them what kind of guy I am so I can get out of here!
[Eric has his eyes closed while Jennifer runs her fingers through his hair]
ERIC: You’re a bad, bad man.
[Longer indecipherable part]
DANA: You promised Angela that you’d never disappoint her.
LIBBY: How long will it be until you hurt Angela like you hurt us?
JENNIFER: A week? A day?
SHAWN: [worried] I don’t... I don’t know.
[Angela walks in with Cory]
ANGELA: [to the girls] What are you doing?!
JENNIFER: We’re doing you a favour, Angela, you just don’t know it.
ANGELA: [unlocking the handcuffs] What I do know is Shawn would have been here for our date if it wasn’t for you guys.
SHAWN: I tried, I wanted to be with you more than anything tonight.
[Shawn and Angela embrace]
JENNIFER: The defender will refrain from using his charm to sway the witness!
DANA: And we’re not leaving until you admit that you’re not boyfriend material.
CORY: [steps forward] Y’know what, give the guy a break! I mean, Shawn’s made some mistakes, yeah, but he’s learning from them.
JENNIFER: I guess you would know about making mistakes, Cory Matthews. You made the biggest one of all when you lied to Topanga.
DANA & LIBBY: Ooh.
CORY: [to Jennifer] I never liked you, did I?
JENNIFER: No. [to everyone] Cory Matthews: Exhibit A. All-round nice guy. If he can’t be trusted – can any man be trusted?
[Longer indecipherable part]
[When the episode quality comes back, Cory and Topanga are talking in the boathouse]
CORY: [cheerfully] Good! Then let’s go to Chubbies and pretend it’s our first date again, we’ll start all over!
TOPANGA: Cory, I don’t want to have to start all over.
[Indecipherable - when it plays again, Shawn and Angela are talking while everyone watches except Topanga, who has left]
ANGELA: I don’t care what these girls think!
SHAWN: But they’re right!
[The girls, watching on, look surprised to see Shawn agree with them]
SHAWN: I have always wanted to feel for somebody what Cory feels for Topanga. [walks over to the girls and speaks to them] So I made promises I couldn’t keep, and I said things that I wanted to feel. And I kissed you like I loved you. I’m sorry if I hurt any of you... I didn’t mean to. [turns to Angela] But I care about you too much to do that to you. [looking at her earnestly] I want to change our relationship... because I think you have to be friends before you can fall in love.
ANGELA: [kindly] You want to be my friend?
SHAWN: That’s where I want to start.
ANGELA: And where do you want to end up?
SHAWN: I don’t want to end up saying things that I don’t mean. And I don’t want to end up making a promise that I can’t keep. Not to you.
ANGELA: [smiles] Why not to me?
SHAWN: I don’t want to say...
ANGELA: Because you care about me?
SHAWN: I’m not talking!
ANGELA: What are you doing tonight?
ANGELA: You wanna hang out?
SHAWN: [smiles] Yeah.
ANGELA: [sighs] Good.
[Shawn and Angela make their way out of the boathouse with an arm around each other. As they pass Cory Shawn stops]
SHAWN: Hey Cor, you shouldn’t be alone, why don’t you come with us?
CORY: No, you guys go ahead I’m going to go to Chubbies.
SHAWN: Why? Why are you going to go there?
CORY: Because Topanga’s going to be there. I – I know her. She’ll be there. At least I hope she’s there...
[Cory, Shawn and Angela leave the boathouse]
DANA: [tearfully] That was just so sweet! Isn’t it the best to have friends?
[Jack and Eric approach the girls; Eric sits on Jennifer’s lap and Jack puts an arm around Libby and Dana]
ERIC: Hm, I don’t know. What do you guys think about a nice romantic dinner...
JACK: No lies. No false promises.
ERIC: Just a lovely evening with two well-intentioned guys.
JENNIFER: Well-intentioned guys... is there really such a thing?
ERIC: Oh, you’ve got to learn to be more trusting.
[The girls, Jack and Eric get up to leave; Eric takes the handcuffs from the ladder and puts them in his pocket]
[Chubbies. Cory is sitting alone at a booth with a bunch of roses, regularly checking his watch. All around him, the staff are clearing up – it’s closing time. Shawn and Angela are sitting at a table not too far away, and Shawn watches Cory anxiously, then gives Angela a look and the two sit with Cory. Shawn puts an arm around Cory for comfort.]